The future's so bright...

Normally, I don't go naming any of the people among the groups who hire me.  There are two reasons for that - first is that I'm terrible at remembering names, so I don't have to worry about getting it right.  Second is that I worry a little about the privacy of those who might not want to be named.  Now, since I've been posting pictures more and more often, the privacy issue might be largely redundant.  The remembering part, though... that's as relevant as ever.

Today's group, though... they had already been a bit prepared.  The name of the bride was plastered all over the wall, with a couple of photographs taped up.  I haven't vetted the pictures I plan to use yet, so that name might be revealed to any readers of this blog.  But I'm still going to refer to her as "the bride".  Just like I always do.

This was actually one of the easiest classes I've ever organised.  Mostly because I didn't actually do all that much organising.  The girl who hired me was very efficient.  The original plan had been to hold the event in Dumfries, but it got moved to Glasgow at a very early stage.  I told the organiser about The Tiki Bar, and said that was a favourite venue of mine - in fact, my only regular venue in Glasgow, but still an incredibly cool place.  I sent her my usual link to the bar's website and in her next email to me, she spoke about how she had called the bar right away.  Apparently the bar staff enthused about my classes, so I get a little extra validation and she signed everybody up for their Cocktail Making Masterclass as well.  That would have been held shortly after the tutor and I left.

The introduction was fun, again.  I noticed that there was a sort of cupboard (I missed it on previous visits to The Tiki Bar) and I asked the barman if it was OK to use it.  He pointed out that it was tiny, but since I was only going to be hiding inside it, that was cool with me.  I set up the room so that the bride's chair was facing in that general direction to make sure she'd get the best possible view of my introduction, tucked my clothes behind a bit of furniture at the back of the room and waited for the organiser to arrive.

When she did, we went through the introduction and I described how Adriana could cue up the usual boring routine - claiming she was going to teach them to draw fruit.  She loved that and I asked how she wanted me to step out.  Some people like me to be wearing something right at the start.  But no... naked... she was very adamant on that one.  Later, she told me her boyfriend says that she's bossy.  I just thought that she was a woman who knew exactly what she wanted and wasn't shy about saying so.

I couldn't close the cupboard door properly,  but that meant I had a great view of what was going on through the crack by the hinge.  I could see a large chunk of the room.  At one point, I could see one girl showing another girl a ring she was wearing, and I thought I'd identified the bride.  Apparently not, though - this was a girl who had recently become engaged.

A couple of minutes later, I thought I'd messed up on the surprise when another girl (who actually turned out to be the bride) walked to the back of the room.  I was surprised and curious to see that she was carrying a pair of skis and wearing a skiing outfit.  She went looking for somewhere to set down the skis, which meant she glanced behind a piece of furniture and saw my clothes piled up.  She was curious about them and commented on them, but didn't pick up on what they really implied.  I was a bit anxious at that point, but after a moment she found her seat and sat down.  And so I waited for my cue.

There were no shrieks or screams when I stepped out of the cupboard.  In fact, it was the most chilled out and relaxed response I've ever had.  I was almost disappointed.  But then I loved the way they just took everything in their stride after that.  The poses, the challenges, the whole lot.  They definitely seemed to enjoy themselves, anyway.  And, like the organiser, they didn't seem particularly shy with their requests or thoughts or ideas.  I still wouldn't have referred to anyone as being "bossy", though.

A couple of times I was asked to wear shades, as part of a couple of the poses.  I loved them.  Being naked is one thing.  Being naked with shades on is just quirky.

I asked about the skis, but she wouldn't elaborate.  She claimed to have been skiing in France that morning and hadn't had time to get changed yet.  A good answer, but I've got my doubts.  There's no way she could convince me on that one.  I'm not an idiot.  I know she could have got changed at the airport.

Later... inevitably... we used the skis as props in one of the poses.

Like last week, I picked out favourite pictures from every pose.  Like last week, the plan was to have individual winners as we went along - then one final, overall winner at the end.  Unlike last week, however, the overall winner somehow got forgotten amidst the sheer energy of the whole event.  I only remembered about it much later, and I was gutted.

During one pose, there were three great pictures and I couldn't pick a favourite.  They each had great physical characteristics going on, so they were immediately referred to as Bruce Forsyth, Frankenstein's monster and the missing link.  Seriously... if you'd seen these specific pictures, you'd have got the references right away.  Assuming you knew who Bruce Forsyth was, of course.

The bride at one point asked me what I was doing in July of 2014 - I think a friend of hers is getting married.  So if she books me, that might turn out to be the most foreplanned event I've ever had.  So, now I really hope the world doesn't end this year, because I really wouldn't want to disappoint her.

The last pose of the class - like in the last couple of weeks - was the "Make a Giant Man" pose.  I should get name all these poses and get some cards printed up or something.  That would be fun.  When we laid it out, it seemed that this group of girls were particularly interested in drawing my torso.  One claimed that she had drawn my groin, but no matter how I looked at it or what way I held it, I just couldn't see it at all.  In the end, I told her it looked like a medieval helmet and put it above my head instead - or above where my head would have been, if anyone had drawn me with a face.

The bride was drawing me in profile and she drew my nose - nothing else.  Fair enough... the only thing bigger than my nose is my chin, so that worked in profile.  So, perhaps the Giant Man needed a helmet - to disguise the fact that the rest of his face was hidden.